I am 'Harry PotterThe GAY boy who lived!
by wingedwiccan
Summary: Harry finds out he's gay, and soon develops a crush on a certain Ice Prince. Along with the help of his mystery pan-pal, can he get the one he wants? Read to find out! HMDM BZGW HGOC boyXboy and girlXgirl SLASH! don't like, don't read!
1. Confession

Hey, this is my first story that is being published, so don't be too harsh! Um, I don't own anything but my thoughts and dreams… sadly, all characters belong to JK Rowling, and so does the story line of HP. (except AJ and Jace. They are my only characters besides unimportant people named in passing) So anyways, hope you enjoy!!! (ShikaNejiLuv this is for u!! to HD SMEXY-NESS!!!!)

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Harry sat in the owlry, during his free period. He'd beed going to Hogwarts for 5 years now, and had developed many relationships. Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley were his two best friends. And his worst enemy, well, that was in school at least, was Draco Malfoy. The reason for Harry's being in the owlry was that he needed a place to think privately, he loved his friends dearly, and they knew everything about him, except this. Ron couldn't know this! It was way too… strange.

Harry's POV

'OMG. I can't believe this!! I can't be…. I mean, I'm NOT a…' I think.

"Ugh!!!" I shout, startling the owls, 'I'm not a fruit!" I think, 'I can't be gay!' I feel wetness, and look for the rain, but there isn't a cloud in the sky, it's a perfect day. So I just accept the tears and let them fall. 'Last night, with Fred, it wasn't… I… Fuck! Ok, he fucked me, gave me a blowjob, and I got off.' I think as my head falls into my hands and I give myself up to the sobs trying to rip out my throat.

I sit there, among the owls, crying, until I hear a noise. I hastily shut up and wrap my invisibility cloak around me, effectively shielding me from view. The footsteps get louder, and my body tenses, waiting. Hermione's bushy haired head pops around the corner. 

"Harry?" I sigh and pull off the cloak, but keep my head down.

"Harry, there you are, where have you been? We've been looking everywhere for you!" she walks to me and sits down.

"What's wrong Harry?" she asks, patting my knee.

"Nothing." my voice is muffled by my knees, which I am holding to my chest, and resting my head on.

"Harry, I know you better than that, something's wrong, and I'd like it a lot if you'd tell me." She says, I sigh and peek up at her, hoping she wouldn't see my year-streaked face. 

"Please tell me Harry." she repeats softly. "Promise you won't hate me, and you won't tell?" my voice quivers.

"I could never hate you Harry, and I promise I won't tell." she replies sincerely. "Ok, um, well…Hermione… Fuck…I'm sorry, I can't say it…" I say and she scoots closer, "Whenever you're ready, honey. I can't judge you, I already know you, so I know that no matter what, you're still you, and you're a great person Harry." 

I love Hermione; she always knows just what to say to make me feel better. "IsleptwithFredlastnightandIthinkI'mgay!" it bursts from my lips quickly, damn traitors, those lips of mine are! 

Her shock shows for a second, but it's soon replaced by a warm smile. "Really? That's great Harry!" she says and I raise my head to look at her. "How is that great Hermione?" I ask. "Ginny's trying to find you and ask you to Hogsmeade with her, and I knew that you didn't like her that way, but she insists that you answer her to her face, so now you can go with mw, and we can talk!" she smiles.

"… Ginny is… HIS SISTER HERMIONE!!!! I can't tell her that stuff!!" I practically shout. 

"And you don't have to tell her! Just say that you already planned to go with me, and she'll lay off!!" she smiles and I look at her, "Are you sure?" I ask.

"Almost positive, c'mon!" She pulls me up and I wipe my tears away. "Thanks for telling me Harry," I smile. "It's no problem Hermione, really, I needed to tell someone." she smiles back and I hold out my arm. "Shall we?" she puts her arm through mine. 

"We shall!" she replies, and we walk down the hallways like that, smiling all the way to the common room.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Well there it is! Hope you enjoyed it, feel free to comment! Also, thi title isn't permanent, but I'm not good at naming things, so if you have suggestions, please tell me!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks!

wingedwiccan


	2. Why Are There So Many Weasleys?

Once again, I own none of the Harry Potter characters or storylines; it all belongs to JK Rowling. But AJ and Jace are characters of MY MAKING!!!!! So if you'd like to use them pleasepleaseplease just ask me!

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

At the end of my last class, on my way to the common room, I run into Ginny. "Harry! Can I have a word?" I smile at Katie Bell, who I'd been talking to about Quiddich formations, and she says, "Ok, well I'll see ya' Harry!" and with a wave, she's gone.

"Can it wait until we get to the tower, Ginny, I want to shower, I feel… unclean." she laughs. "Sure Harry, get yourself clean, I can wait a bit."

"Thanks, it's all Snape's fault, he had me nervous the whole time I was in potions and I was sweating bullets!!" she laughs with me and we reach the portrait of the Fat Lady.

"Spikenard." Ginny says for me, and the doorway to the Gryffindor common room is revealed. We go inside, and I leave Ginny in there, heading to the 6th year boy's dormitories.

"Hey Harry!" Neville says, and I reply with a simple "Hey Neville" while getting my pajamas.

"Be right back, I've gotta shower."

"Ok." he replies.

I close the bathroom door and strip down, then jump in the shower and proceed to get clean. Once out, and smelling pretty good, I towel dry my hair, and brush my teeth before leaving.

"I'm off to talk to Ginny now. Wish me luck!" I say to Neville and he laughs

"Luck Harry!" his voice rings out behind me as I exit the room and descend the stairs to Ginny. She's sitting in one of the plush chairs by the fire, so I sit in the chair next to hers. She smiles "Harry, you're finially done!"

"Yeah, I feel loads better too!" I say and she laughs. "I bet, so where were you all day? I was looking for you."

"Oh, you were?" I ask, avoiding her question.

"Yeah, nobody else had seen you either." she tells me, scooting alittle closer to me in her chair.

"I just had to think a bit, Gin, my mind was a little overloaded…" I reply.

"Oh, ok, I suppose it does that every now and then, what with being 'the famous Harry Potter' and all." she looks at me.

I shrug. "Yeah, I guess."

"Anyway, I wanted to know," she is now sitting lightly on the arm of my chair. She turns her head to the side so that her beautiful red hair, so much like Fred's, spills over her shoulder to tickle my cheek. "Would you want to go, with me…" she scoots closer to me, and suddenly I find myself with a lapful of Ginny, straddling me, "To Hogsmeade, this weekend, on, like, a date?" she whispers breathily, and where it might have turned me on a couple months ago, I find myself limp and a bit flustered. Not like 'hot and bothered' flustered, but because it was scary to think that just last night, her brother got what Ginny's trying to do to me now, but he didn't even have to try. Ginny, on the other hand, was seriously trying.

" Ginny, sweetheart…" her eyes light up at this. "I-I'm… Hermione and I agreed a few days ago to go together, and, I mean, it would be a lot of fun to go with you, I'm sure, but, I can't back out on Hermione…" her face falls.

"So she wasn't lying then. I'm sorry, I just thought she was lying to me to try to steal you form me,"

"Ginny, I'm not dating you." I say bluntly.

"I know, but… I like you Harry, a lot." she tries to look coy, peeking up at me through her long eyelashes, but all I can think about how cute and small she is, and then I look down, trying to avoid feeling guilty at turning her down, but find that, much worse than seeing the pain in her eyes, I get a clear view of her boobs.

"Ginny, I can't do this! I. Don't. Like. You!" she blinks, and the pain travels from just her eyes to her whole face. "Ginny, I don't like any girl, and if I'm right about what I'm feeling, I won't ever like a girl as anything more than a friend." I say.

"Y-you're G-"

"Ginny, nobody but you and Hermione knows, please don't tell _anybody_. Please?" I beg, she gets off my lap.

"Ok Harry, but you're _gay_?!" she says in an incredulous whisper. I sigh and shrug.

"Yeah, I guess I am…" she smiles, then, "So instead of worrying about you looking at other girls, I'll have to worry about you checking out my boyfriends!"

"No! I wouldn't do that to you Ginny!"

"Ok Harry, I've got to go to bed now, k? Night, ya little homo!" she hugs me and trots off to the girls' dormitories.

"Night." I call after her, and then a plop on the cough on my other side signals me that somebody's here.

"Harry, mate! So what did you say to Gin?" Ron's chipper voice reminds me slightly of Fred's.

"I told her no." I say softly, dreading him finding out I like blokes, he has quite the temper… "What?!" he says.

"I'm going with Hermione, Ginny's ok with it." he looks at me strangely.

"Y-you and… and Hermione!?!" His eyes are as wide as saucers, and I hastily reply; "NO! No! Just as friends!" he relaxes.

"Ok, no offence to her or anything, she's a pretty girl and all, but she's like a sister to us!!"

"Yeah, I know, I love her and all that mushy stuff, but it would be… she's just not my type." he smiles.

"I didn't think so' your type is less¼anal." I blush, thinking 'oh, yes they are… much more anal, only it's not about schoolwork…'

"Harry! Ron! Hey!" speak of the devil, Hermione comes and sits in the chair on my other side, and we talk for a couple hours before going to our respective beds and fall asleep.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Well, there's another chapter! Thanks to all you reviewers! Especially ShikaNejiLuv and njferell!! Anyway, I'll update when I can, please review!!!

wingedwiccan


	3. Mystery Note

Once again, I don't own Harry Potter, all of it belongs to JKR, lucky her…. Anyway, here's chapter 3!

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The next morning Seamus wakes me up, and we all quickly dress and head to the Great Hall for breakfast. I walk with them to the Gryffindor table and sit in an empty chair and start filling my plate with pancakes (chocolate chips, mind you), eggs, bacon, and sausage. Hermione takes the seat across from me and grabs the sliced strawberries in strawberry syrup for me.

"Thanks Hermione." I say.

"No problem, Hare-bear!" she states brightly, and I choke on my mouthful of food.

I swallow quickly and splutter "H-hare-bear?! That's an awful nickname!"

She simply laughs. "I know. And by the way, bring lots of money to Hogsmeade tomorrow, ok?"

My mouth is full of sausage, so I tilt my head to the side in a gesture of 'why?'

"Don't ask why Harry, it's a surprise." I shrug and we fall into the comfortable silence of eating. In a few minutes, after we've finished, and we're walking to our first lesson (History of Magic with the Hufflepuffs), a panting first-year hails us in the hall.

"Harry! Harry!" he calls.

"Yeah?" I ask, he pants a bit, and hands me a small roll of parchment.

"Erm, thanks?" I say. "Who's it from?" Hermione asks, scowling. The first year, who I now notice is a Slytherin, smirks, his ask-brown hair falling out of place into his strange minty-green eyes.

"Can't tell. It's not something that's going to hurt you though," he says, noticing the careful way I was holding the parchment.

"By the way, I'm Jace; you might be seeing a lot of me." He winks at Hermione flirtatiously, before walking off.

"Weird… C'mon, we'll test it for charms and hexes in class, kay?" Hermione says.

"Ok, let's go." I reply and we walk into class and sit down at an empty table with four chairs. A Hufflepuff comes up and asks Hermione if she can sit by her, and we both smile warmly at her.

"Of course, I'm Hermione, by the way, and this is Harry." Hermione introduces us, and I smile again and wave.

"Aubrey-Jane Winters." she says softly.

"Nice to meet you, Aubrey-Jane." Hermione replies cheerfully.

"Please, call me AJ." she says, and I try to really get a look at her. Her hair is almost exactly the color of pomegranate seeds, and is short, about the same length as mine. She has longer bangs though, and they slightly cover the tops of her eyes, bringing attention to the bright sky-blue eyes, seeing as they contrast so much. She's kinda tall, for a sixth-year girl, and under her robes you can see the bottoms of her jeans, which girls aren't supposed to wear, well, neither are boys, but the girls wear skirts and the boys wear slacks.

"So, um, AJ then, what're you're hobbies?" I ask, and she smiles.

"I'm an artist, I'm not great, but I enjoy it." Right after we reply with "Really? That's awesome, I bet you're great!", Ron runs in, huffing and puffing, almost late.

"Made it!" he smiles and sits next to me before noticing AJ, "Uhm, Harry, who's that?"

"AJ, she's nice." I whisper back, and Professor Binns starts his boring lesson.

"Harry, let me see the note." Hermione speaks to me softly while writing notes, seeming to be intent on the lesson. I hand it to her and she taps her wand on it and whispers a spell, after a second, the tip of her wand glows green, then works appear in smoke.

"Just a sealing charm. Open it up, Harry, it's safe." she whispers to me, and slips it into the palm of my hand. I quietly cast the counter spell for the sealing charm, and it unfurls. It says:

Harry,

I heard that you possibly play for the home team, so to speak, is it true? If so, I'd be here of you need to talk, I myself am a bisexual guy, so I know partly what you must be going through. Don't think bad of me just because I had this delivered to you by a first year of my House, he's a good kid, really. But anyway, if you would like a pen-pal of sorts, meet me in the owlry at eleven-thirty, sharp. You won't recognize me, but neither will anybody else, so disguise yourself, and remember, eleven-thirty!! So, I hope to see you, have a good afternoon.

With care,

B.

"How strange of a letter, he seemed to ramble abit, maybe he's nervous, oooh, or maybe he _likes _you!!" Hermione whispers in my ear, I blush and say "Shutup! He just wants to help me…" she shakes her head and continues writing in her notes while I work to copy Ron and fall asleep.

The day passes uneventfully, we had Herbology with the Hufflepuffs also that day, so we got to know AJ a bit better, but, other than that, it sicked. Truthfully, I was freaking out about tonight. What was going to happen? Was B. even attractive? So, I took a shower around seven, and got started on some homework.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Well there's another chapter! Special thanks to **Idina Malfoy, 59ukefan, njferrell, ShikeNejiLuv, and migsantiago **for reviewing!!!! You guys get cookies!!!!!!!! (:J so if you review, you'll get a cookie too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	4. Meeting B

Ok well here's the next chapter, thanks too all my reviewers! Here's a cookie for each of you! ( :: ) !!!!! So I still don't own HP…..

( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) ( :: ) I love cookies…..!

By the time eleven rolled around, most everyone had gone to bed, and I'd finished my potions and Herbology homework.

"Harry! It's almost time! Put your cloak on, grab the map and go!" Hermione practically shoves me up the stairs, and I grab the invisibility cloak and the Marauders' Map and get ready to leave.

"Ok, hurry Harry, or you'll be late! Be back by 12, ok? Bye!" she says and I find myself in the dark hall. I tap the map and say that I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good. Hogwarts appears, and I search for Filtch/Mrs. Norris, and the prefects, and mark their positions in my mind. Filtch is in the dungeons and none of the prefects are in my path of reaching the owlry.

I cast a silencing spell on my shoes to quiet my footsteps, and start towards the owlry. Once there, I sit down where I had been just yesterday, crying. I start to fall asleep after about 20 minutes, but jolt awake as I hear footsteps. Forgetting the map, where it's deactivated in my cloak pocket, I quiet my breathing and wait.

I hear someone climbing the stairs, and mentally sigh in relief when it's just a boy… a very attractive boy, I notice a couple seconds later. He sits opposite me, and looks around the room, then casts tempus to check the time.

"Fuck, it's 11:28, stupid Filtch!" I try to look closer at him, he's fairly tall, almost a full head taller than me, and has sort-of wavy brown/black hair, but I can't tell which it is, because of the darkness, and an overall nice face.

"Is he not going to show up?" he whispers to himself, and I take that as my cue to leave and 'appear'. I go down the stairs a ways, release the quiet-walk spell on my feet, and start back up the stairs. As I walk I take off my cloak and shrink it, then pocket it.

When I reach the top of the stairs, , I look towards the boy. "Are you B?" I ask and he smiles and nods.

'He has nice teeth' I think, then he asks; "So, I take it you're gay?" his voice is on the deeper side, more than mine, but it's smooth, a, oh, what's it called? Oh yeah! Bedroom voice! Smooth, seductive. I blush, realizing I'm staring, and nod quickly.

"B-but don't tell." my voice is quiet, and it wavers on the first word.

"I promise." He smiles again, and then says; "Sit down, I won't bite." I sit next to him and he scoots a bit closer.

"So what made you realize it?" he asks me.

"I… Uh… well…" I stutter, and he smiles again.

"What about I tell you how I found out? It's not all over the school, so don't worry about that."

"Ok, sounds fair, and good, that kinda scared me…" I reply.

"Ok, well this is a secret too, so don't tell." I promise not to, and he leans closer.

"I'm dating George." he says, without embellishment.

I gasp, "OMG really?! How cute!!!" I squeal, he laughs and puts his hands up, "Thanks, so right there, any doubts I had about Fred telling me about you're sexuality, yeah they're gone now." we laugh and continue talking for a bit, connecting instantly, until he checks his still working tempus spell and gasps.

"OMG! It's almost time for me to go! I promised my housemates that I'd be back from my… 'bath in the prefects bathroom' by 12!"

"Shit, I told Hermione I'd be back by 12 too!" I tell him and he reaches into his pocket, then casts engorgio (the counter to reducio AKA the shrinking charm) on a small item in his hand. A book grows, and once it's full sized he hands it to me.

"It's a two way journal, I have the other one." he tells me.

"How does it work?" I ask.

"You write in it, and it transfers to my page, producing a copy in my book, and will record all the conversations we have, unless we want to delete them." he explains. "Ok." I reply

"Now go! We've got like four minutes!" he pushes my to the stairs and we descent them.

"Talk to you later then!" he calls to me as we part ways. "OK! Night!" I reply, and yank out my cloak, round the corner, un-shrink it, and tug it on, then silence my feet, and run to the common room.

"Harry! You're late! But you're ok!" Hermione greets me as she hugs me. I smile.

"He's really nice Hermione! And he gave me a 2 way journal so that I can write to him whenever I have a problem and we don't risk getting caught by scheduling meetings in the middle of the night to talk!"

"Really? I'll have to chack out that journal, to make sure it's not like a repeat of the Ginny/Voldemort thing." she says, suddenly stern, though I can understand why.

She opens the book to the first page, and pulls out her wand, but before she does anything, words appear on the page in red ink.

_Did you make it Harry?_

**Yeah.**

I reply, Hermione is completely enthralled and fascinated.

_Ok, no Filtch?_

**Nope.**

_Good, I'll talk to you tomorrow then?_

**Sure. Talk to you later!**

_Alright!_

**Night.**

_Oh, before I forget, Hermione, I bet you're worried about this book. I swear it _

_isn't cursed. Ask the twins if you want… Night Harry, Hermione._

"_Ask the twins?! How would they know?!" Hermione says as I close the book._

"_B's dating George." I say, and she gasps. "Really?" "Yeah, but don't tell, ok?"_

_She crosses her heart. "I swear!" I smile at the childish muggle promise gesture, and suggest that we go to bed. She nods and grabs the book she had been reading while I was gone, and hugs me goodnight quickly._

"_Night Harry, sleep well." I grab the journal, and wish her pleasant dreams as well and head up to my dorm. I'm so tired, I just perform cleaning spells on my teeth and face and strip to my boxers. I set the journal in my bedside table's drawer and climb in bed, barely getting the covers over my chest before I fall asleep._

_Well, there's chapter 4, I think…? Lol sorry it took so long, I'd typed part of it up and my parents kicked me off the computer for that weekend, and I'm not allowed on on weeknights, so it's stupid… But I'll update as soon as possible. I LOVE REVIEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)_


End file.
